Forgiveness & 2nd Chances

So, I was just thinking about some things and it came to me that a lot of people I know or did know have been through times where they felt hated. This may be online or in real life, but one thing they felt was judgment and hate and all that other bad stuff.

My theory is this:
It is hard to forgive people sometimes, but if you were in their position, you would want forgiveness too.

And yes, some people make the same mistakes over and over and it may be hard to keep giving them chances, but it is always best to give people these chances. I have had experiences in the past with people that I despised and didn't talk to for a long time. One day when I was really mad at them still, I realized that all that hatred and anger I had towards them was causing me more pain than it was causing them more pain. I forgave the people who caused me issues and we became friends again and moved on. This is mostly people irl, but the same applies on here. It hurts me to see some people on here and people irl who feel worthless because people are hard on them or just don't understand their choices or decisions (whether they may be good or bad decisions or choices).

So just to keep things simple, that is all I wanted to say.

And remember:
It is good to forgive, but better to know when to forgive. Forgiveness is hard and so are second chances, but you are giving something away and that is always difficult to do regardless of what it may be. Also, if you ever feel hated on here to the point where you question yourself and your life altogether, it is always best to take a break. This is online and people online don't know you like people around you do. Don't ever let people online get to you and don't take every bad thing you hear or read about yourself too hard. At the end of the day, only you can judge yourself and choose to change what choices or decisions you personally thought were bad. You make the executive decisions and that is how it should be. If people aren't willing to forgive you, they are not worth your time.

 

It's not easy to forgive, but it is good to forgive. Everyone deserves a second chance, even if you hate them. No one should get judge for something they like, but no matter what someone's going to hate you for whatever you do, and all you have to do is to not focus on the bad and think positive.
I really like this quote I heard "Things happen for a reason." This quote really speaks to me and I think about it when something major happens in my life or in someone else's. Depression is one of the worst things that can happen to someone and honesty everyone has been there and people deal with this kind of thing in their own way. Everyone's unique in their own way. Now I don't believe people are born with a specific purpose, but everyone is great at something, and if you love something then follow that dream and never give it up.

 

Here is my quote for this

Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice can't put the blame on you. Fool me three times f*ck the peace sign load up the chopter let it rain on you.

 

Wow, I just read this whole thing. Very factful, and interesting.

I've been in a situation where I was really mad at one of my friends. Like, not just mad. I was pissed (very sorry for language).
It took me a day or so to think things other with, but I now know the best thing to do is forgive and forget, if the situation wasn't life threatening, or anything near that category.

And I myself, try my hardest to not let online people get to me. I've been insulted many times, by many people. It requires strength to know it isn't the end of the world.

Thank you for stating this.

 

J. Cole <3

 

Those who can't forgive are not going to go far in life ~ that's what I say.

 

Story time: (Haven't posted in a while)
Earlier during the schoolyear, a girl outed me to my entire school after bullying me for a month straight. Of course my friends were supportive, but that's beside the point. She denied ever bullying me and claims she did nothing wrong and "never said any of the things" she was accused of (even though there were screenshots & etc). I basically was in a terrible place mentally during that time period but even with how much she hurt me, I still tried to forgive.

Now, forgiveness doesn't mean second chances. I gave her second chances throughout the time period and by now, the situation is mostly blown over, and although I forgive her, she doesn't deserve another opportunity to hurt me. The difference between before and after forgiving her is I don't want to kill her or myself anymore, but it's never going to be the same as it was. It isn't going to be 'just fine' because how I felt isn't a way anybody needs to feel.

 

Thank you so much for sharing. I think it is important for people to know that it is okay to forgive others. Sometimes forgiving is a step to benefit yourself and others. Sorry that happened to you. Hopefully things are better now for you.

 

@Joseph10003 Thanks. I'm glad I'm not alone.

I will admit, politics is not my only third party life from ItsJerryAndHarry. I have been on some servers that have PvP games, and mainly seeking out victims of cyber-bullying and helping them out of depression. I've also been thinking upon creating a website dedicated to helping victims of cyber-bullying, and also have decided to combat it where possible.

The worst part was that I felt hypocritical in doing this because of the days of OITC I had. And still to this day, you will log into the OITC server only to be greeted by a world of trolls and negatives, constantly belittling others to boost their self-esteem. I will admit, around a year ago, I possessed the same mentality, and I still have thoughts in my mind that never leave of how I was once what I truly despise and hate right now.

There are some who still haven't forgiven me, and I always kept telling myself I did my part in reforming, but they're not doing their part by forgiving me. It's nice to know I'm not alone in helping people out of depression. It's also eased my mind to know I have support from people like you. I've created a thread for any victims of the violent world we have on the internet. http://itsjerryandharry.com/threads/to-victims-of-cyber-bullying.85537/

 

Forgiveness is something that you will have to do everyday of your life. Thank you for pointing this out. Many people out there are still not forgiven for the things they have done to others.

Many powerful words like these may be a step to changing someones life.

 

forgiveness isn't always an option

it depends on how you feel about the case.

somethings, yea, forgive forget
others, no

you'll find out which option is best in the moment.
sometimes it is better to forgive, and sometimes it is better to leave that person.
limit contact, etc.

because if you do, over time, you stop feeling towards them, they become just a person. This way, you can interact like you would to a normal person to them.

 

Forgive, but never forget.

 

I feel like people aren't understanding "forgiveness". Forgiving someone is a pardon, not becoming besties with them. Alot of people want to be forgiven for something, then go immediately to friends on the relationship scale. Now ofcourse I'm not talking about forgiving a friend for like, eating your french fries or something. bc tbh those aren't even big enough to ask for "forgiveness"(Unless your friend is a stubborn brat who really likes french fries), but for problems like getting stabbed in the back by one of your friends, or some guy was cussing you out.

"Forgiveness" is supposed to put you on neutral terms. If the person who you forgave wants to be friends immediately, that's a sign that they probably just want to hurt you again.

 

I like people doing this kinds of threads. All of us learning at the end.

Well forgiveness is hard if you are really angry. Pretty much forgiving the person who hurted you kinda feels good. Like that one forgiveness removes that problem. If you don't forgive the person, he/she wouldn't forget what they done to you since you denied them. Wouldn't it be more evil to deny someone's apology? Didn't you do evil after denying him/her? Sometimes Life isn't always the way you want everytime. Life can be changed if we just all forgive each other. Wouldn't there be peace if we did that to all of us? Wouldn't be people stop fighting by forgiving? Wouldn't you be a monster when not forgiving all the people who hurted you? If you don't forgive the person, you'll never forget it. We are simply humans that can't deny temptation. We are just humans who wants to conquer. We are humans that can atleast do good in our life. We are just humans that cannot be denied.