Bad Ban Appeals 3.0

PROLOGUE:
Long, long ago, in a galaxy far away, a man named @Xenohs made a beautiful thread called "Ban Appeals 2.0." It was lost to history, unfortunately..

But I have come to save the dying thread. The idea will be born anew.

Introducing Ban Appeals 3.0! Post ridiculous ban appeals here.

Rules:

No NFSW.

Try not to poke fun at other real ban applications.

EXAMPLES:

WiiGamsaregood: NOTCH UNBAN ME BECUZ I am HeROBrina an JEB wilAA kill u becz i wsz band unfarly!! unbn m noqq!!!!

Thesaurus16GB: u r NUBSCRUBZ an I will 360NOSCOP U if U DUN UNBAN ME

BoardGamesAreNoFun: Please unban me. I sorta didn't not mean it when I begged for hours to be banned. If you don't unban me, I will come to your house and lick all your 3DS cartriges. You'll be sorry then.

JJMasterMaSTER: UNBANUNBANUNBANMEMEMEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE

 

U gais sed tht i wudnt get unband aftir 5 ban apeels
I maid 6
How abowt now?

 

i am HEROBRINE!!@! if u dont unban me, i wool come 2 ur house and steal notches computer and steal your 3ds and steal your lightbulbs and steal your cat and steal your hat and steal your bubblegum and then steal you and feed you to a squirrel!!!! u need 2 unban me unless u wan nasty thins to happn 2 u!!!

 

IGN: Oh. They're those reviewer guys. They invented "TOO MUCH WATER!"
Reason of ban: I totally wasn't using a hacked client to derp and use killaura in front of Xenon. I totally didn't do that. My little brother named Jefferfyyy_211 hacked my account and did that. It's totally a true story.
Why you deserve to be unbanned: Pwetty pweease with a cherry on top and dipped in fudge? Pweease unban me?

 

Hi. I'm Barack Obama. If you don't unban me, I will nuke Antarctica.

Yours truly,

 

IGN LETS PLAE 10.1337 : ducktuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

SKREENSHUT of 360 NOSCUPE: l33t.

why you deserved to be unbanned: plx unben ne der ur stuin chln in hose unben n i culd sav dem frm tyrny bc unben mens sweag n culd sav wirdl so unben o wurld is dtryed tnk u so mach 4 ur tiem.

o i eat ur kokie.

(I don't even have a clue of what I just said.)

 

IGN: pewdiepie
Reason of ban: i had so many fanboys in factions and oitc i had to hack there game so they cud stop. i didnt mean it.
Why you deserves to be unbanned: because i am pewdiepie i can pay you a kazillion dollars so ye i am rich so i am sorry once again please un ban me i did nothin wrong i will give you a shout out on utube subscribe at "the real pewdiepie1337" tanks

 

hi i am mr. spambot BUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEand I am makinng a ban appsalBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAME i hope I can be unband and stufBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEimsorry for spaming ur srverBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAME i totlly wnt spm ur srver again BUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAMEBUY CHEAP GENERIC ASPRATAME

 

IGN: MorganFreeman

Reason of ban: I ate the staff celebration cake

Why you deserve to be unbanned: The cake was so delicious so its your fault. The tasty creamy oreo cake was there alone in a table so I ate it and I thought it was for me. Unban me now or you'll be banned from my speeches.

 

I am A cat,why would you ban me??

 

Please, unban me.

Like, seriously.

I only hacked, cheated,was mean, said inappropriate words, spammed, used an alt to bypass another ban, exploited bugs, team-killed, and disobeyed staff. I only did it 32 times. Like, I deserve to be unbanned, lol, why was I even banned lel, this is nothing compared to people who bullies.

ps im onli 9

 

This was a real ban appeal from another server. No joke.

 

Just make me an Admin.

 

IGN:hfGqZioPCP0s3Bszj1RX
Reason or screenshot of ban:


Why you should be unbanned?: I HATE YOU UR ADMNS ARE LIKE MIIVERSES THEYRE BAD MEANES I SHOUD BE TRETED BEtER IM ONY 9 IM CRYBNING AT THE COMPUTXER AND U MEANYS ARE MAKIN IT WORS UR ALL MEANYS I HATE YOU UR MEANYS I HATE YOU A LOT

 

just unban me or i'll explode the world

 

I have nukes. I know where you live. I will fire them. Unban me. You have 1 hour. Time is ticking...

 

IGN: TheOfficialJDman

Reason Of Ban: I was not hacking!!!!!!

Why I deserve to be unbanned: IF YOU DONT UNBAN ME I WILL HACK THE SERVER AND HACK ITSJERRY AND ITSHARRY! UNBAN ME THIS SECOND BECAUSE I DONT HACK! YOUR SO MEAN, IM TELLING MY MUMMY AND "THEY" WILL CALL THE POLICE. I DONT HACK!!!!!! I ONLY HAVE 20 HACKED CLIENTS. AND I ONLY USE THEM WHEN NEEDED ON YOUR SERVER (eg: when a pro comes to kill me I put on Kill Aura, Trigger Bot, Anti-Knockback, Auto Criticals, Bow Aimbot, Auto Hit) THATS ALL! ITS STILL BEATABLE!!!!

 

IGN: How am I meant to know my Icicle gorilla name?
Reason you were banned: Lol I built a sex club in creative bcuz my mum plays mc and I wanted to do it with her ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Why you deserve to be unbanned: idk

 

IGN: ItsJerry
Reason of ban or screenshot of ban: Sexual Abuse
Why you deserve to be unbanned: I used a condom