Depression and Stress

Now before you think that this is any drama thread or rant about my life, let me say it is not. I've decided to create this thread as I've noticed it's a common problem in our youth today. Yes, I sometimes feel negative feelings (like every human does), and no, I do not think I need any help.

What's happening?
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So basically in these years of adolescence, depression and stress is almost unavoidable. No matter how happy or lucky you could possibly be, we all feel a certain amount of depression, unless you're someone who feels no emotion.

Teenagers are constantly trying to find their identity in this stage of life. They're trying to figure out who they are, and they are also finding a lot of things to be upset about. Most teenagers believe they are the only ones suffering, and that no one has experienced what they are going through. That is obviously not true, and sometimes things aren't as bad as they seem.

Are you suffering? Well don't suffer alone.
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As I said earlier, most young adults feel as if they are the only ones to suffer through this stage of life, and that they are alone to face what ever shadows await them. However, this isn't true, as we are all human, and we all make mistakes. Just like any brilliant idea you can think of may have already been invented, any mistake you have made in your life has probably been made by someone else before. You are not alone, and just because no one is reaching out to you doesn't mean you can't help yourself. Eventually the things you see as depressing and negative now will be nothing but a laugh when your mind has fully developed.

Are you sure you're going to be like this forever?
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One thing I hear a lot from people who are discussing their problems with me is that their life is ruined, they want to start over, or they're just not satisfied with themselves in general. Your mind is not fully developed until you are twenty-one years old. In these early stages of your life, almost everything is temporary, as you are still trying to decide who you are and what you do. Sometimes it's hard to accept the fact that we aren't perfect and we make mistakes in life. What ever challenges you may be facing as of now may not even cross your mind once you have fully matured.

Be yourself. Don't hide behind a mask just so that someone has a better opinion on you.
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I am one to talk, as I keep to myself and don't post much because I am afraid of offending someone or destroying my reputation, but this is honestly one of the biggest challenges that we face today. Anything from pretending to be someone you're not to acting differently around certain people shows you aren't satisfied with who you are, so you have to pretend to be someone greater. It is hard to find self-satisfaction in these ages of life as your self-esteem is relatively low. It has been a hard challenge for me to not care about one's opinion on me, but someone's opinion on you shouldn't affect you if they don't care about you. If they don't care about you, what exactly is so important about their opinion on you?

Torn apart? Don't let it cut any further.
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Just because depression and stress is normal does not mean that it is something to ignore. Your feelings are absolutely important, and if something is bothering you, you shouldn't hesitate to seek help. The challenge is finding the people who will listen and offer sympathy, and avoiding the ones who ignore and abandon you. You should seek help from anyone you can reach out to, from a friend to a family member, talking about your problems is often a solution to relieving stress.

Focus on socializing a lot more
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Instead of laying around wallowing in your depression, you should spend more time with friends and family. Socializing and being around others often takes your mind off of daily stress and worrying. You may have online friends, but it just isn't the same as physically seeing someone in person.

Hopefully this helped anyone who is suffering from these events in their life. I hope you can understand that none of it is your fault, and just because it is normal does not mean it isn't anything that shouldn't be taken care of. Your life is more important than you think. Have a great day/night.

-Sirius

 

Nice thread! This should at the least help others who are suffering in situations like this.

 

Hey!

I love your thread here, and I just wanted to say a few words as well, because by far, you display the best way of telling the forums about the issue.

The Issue Is Not Fixable.

Teenagers worldwide aren't feeling the same as they hoped they were. Dreams crushed and hopes ruined, a lot of the public youth display depressed, dark, cloudy, ect. thoughts on the world. That shouldn't be a focus, at all. If someone is unhappy where they are, get away. Stay away- move away- just leave.

There is no medicine to fix Anxiety, Bipolar or Depression.
(and I know this because I still have Bipolar and a little bit of Anxiety today.)

A lot of people will say:

"Get a therapist!"

"You need to call a lifeline if it is getting like this."

"Liar!"

"You need help..."

"I can take you to the hopsital, I will drive you!"

But, they don't understand.

Teenagers aren't like that, and for the most part, nobody is like that. If you (or anybody you know) are feeling down or angry, give yourself (or them) some space. On personal experience, attention will drive them crazy. Slowly, let them open up. If they are not opening up, and they are still digging down into a hole, wait a little longer. If it gets any worse, yes, please do call the police.

But if anything, do not say that they need help.

Stay Away From Potential Bullies

Now by potential, it is not your regular school bullies who just pick on people. I mean the ones that backstab you- or are currently your friend/best friend. If they have made you sad, or angry, stay away. Overtime, they will hurt you, behind your back.

If they are questioning about why you are trying to move away from them as soon as possible, don't answer, don't look. If anything just try the old fake headphone is in the ear trick.

Keep close to family or your best friends (the real ones). Don't tell most of them the problem, as they will tell someone, and they tell someone, and so on. It will be a big mess with the school system, (if not in school, then it would just be a crisis) and possibly effect your future career.

Fake As Much As You Can

I don't really advise for you to do this, but if people begin to question you why you are feeling down, you have to lie.

I reccomend you be as happy as possible and try to me the nicest person you can. If this becomes a challenge, maybe a therapist would be best. Telling your parents would be worth it, as they birthed you.

This should work since I have faced the battle of depression.

The war between me and Bipolar will most likely never end.
But I will always stay happy ;)

Thank you for anyone who reads this!

I love you all!
~Zayn

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its kinda annoying, like come on now, lots of kids these days are mentally weak, fuck if you only knew the shit I went too. Fuck I even went homeless once cause shit went down. My parents divorced, My best friend died. Im still on top. Its kinda stupid How i see it. You gotta be mentally strong. One kid says one thing and immma go cry in my room. I get lots of shit at school, people talk trash, but its part of life. Just depends on how you take it in, I take it in as a laughing matter since they gon get their ass beat later. But nor will I bash, If i see you crying or something Ill go and comfort you, but its kinda outa hand how much depression is going around.

 

One of the major things that's causing depression is mainly the internet and social media in general. It was proven that majority of teenagers would choose to disconnect for a given period. Social media has brought us close together, but it has also driven us apart. Depression from the internet can vary on being a victim of cyber bullying, a low reputation, or just caring too much about what someone thinks about you when you don't necessarily even know them in real life.

It's still hard to hammer home the message that sometimes teenagers make things seem a lot worse than they actually are. I've been helping a select few people and I can honestly tell that some of them are making up their reasons for depression to seem like a victim of something that doesn't even exist. What they want is attention, and you're given a choice between helping them and believing them when they could be lying, or seeing them as attention seekers and not getting involved.

It is still a problem online. I will admit, I am facing my own problems and I honestly feel like shutting myself out at times, but my problems are my own, and I understand that there's probably a million others facing the same challenges as I am. If they are strong enough to deal with them on their own, why shouldn't I? My problems are mine, not yours.

 

eh yea, true, lots of people will talk shit, always will, you can be flawless, you will still get shit. Just stay strong minded buddy. Its what ive been taught, to not be weak and be strong.

 

Just wanted to point this out, mental strength in teenagers can vary. You (OP) were stating that many teenagers don't have much mental strength, I disagree though, because many people I know irl are very mentally strong, and can take criticism, including me. Yes, there are some people out there who aren't mentally strong, but it is very likely their peers are stronger mentally, and they can seek help from them.

 

I think it's important to seek help, otherwise you're going to have this vicious feedback loop that will only make your problem worse. Complaining about your problems and not trying to change reinforces your problem(s) and makes it worse. Stay strong guys. :)

 

I just live by the quote "Let people do what they need to do to be happy, mind your own business, and do what you need to do to make yourself happy".

I personally believe depression and stress are overcomeable in the sense that you have to mentally and physically push yourself to overcome it. It doesn't fix itself. A lot of people I see nowadays say the most pathetic things 'My life sucks', 'I want to kill myself', 'no one loves me'. It honestly pisses me off to see that people actually say these things. There are people all over the world that would dream of having access to all the things you own. Your life doesn't suck, you just think it sucks. You think no one cares about you, but in reality people do. You have to make the change for yourself, and if you don't someone else might for you. But don't rely on other people to fix your problems.

Sorry if this doesn't make sense or doesn't relate to the topic, just giving my opinion.

Life is full of misteaks, fix em (:

 

It's nice to see a positive, helpful thread about this subject.

 

Some people might know, I have been having depressing thoughts and this thread definitely changed some of the thoughts that are in my mind. Very helpful. Thanks.

 

Sooo.. I'm someone who feels no emotion?

 

Sorry to say but This thread isn't helpful for someone actually with depression.

1. Depression is a mental illness - there is a different between being sad and having depression. One is an emotion and the other is a diagnosed metal illness.

2. Depression doesn't go away when you are 21 or your brain fully matures - First off you are wrong to say that the brain fully matures at 21 because it doesn't. It different for every person, but most people have fully developed brains around 24-25. That said that doesn't change the fact that you have a mental illness, thats why many older adults have depression.

3. "It will get better" and "You are not alone" are way overused - Every person with depression has heard these words. It's what everyone says and its not helpful. They don't really care if they are going to be fine in five years because right now they feel like shit. So these words wont suddenly make them feel better. I know its positive but still its just overused and seems like the person trying to help doesn't really care.

4. Friends - Sorry but I am pretty sure a majority of the people who are depressed in this world get it because they are alone. They don't have anyone to go to. So to say "Go hang out with friends", is kind of imposible when you don't have any. And trust me real life friends are WAY more different and meaningful then online friends.

All this said, I still want to thank you for trying to help but honestly if you aren't someone who has a psychology major and works as a therapist or doctor then you probably shouldn't try and help a broad amount of people. Its fine and wonderful to help your friends that you personally know because you can be their for them, but making a thread on the internet isn't the best idea.

If you are depressed and need help there is basicly one way to get better and that is to go and get a therapist or doctor or school councilor, etc. and have them professionally take care of you by medicine or what not.

Okay thats a terrible idea

 

The first thing I think anyone should do if they're feeling upset isn't to go right away and self-diagnose themselves with depression. Depression doesn't just happen in 1 day or week, it takes a time of you feeling sulky and down for months at a time and for it to be continuous for basically a while. Your brain has a chemical imbalance and you can't just say that you have depression because you're upset. A lot of people actually deal with this issue worldwide, and they can see someone who can help, take medication, and do things that make them a happier person in general. If you're ever feeling upset at a time, try to distract yourself, listen to music, or just do things that make you very happy. If it's been a long time of you feeling down, months/years- then maybe you want to see someone about it. Try talking to someone who can help you, maybe your parents or even a friend who can just be there to listen and attempt to help you.
If you know anyone who is depressed, or shows signs of being depressed, then try and be there for them. The worst thing you could possibly do to someone who is depressed is tell them that it's fake/for attention. Nobody knows how someone is truly feeling because they're not in that person's shoes. Listen to everything they have to say if they open up to you. If they don't right away, give it some time. People may be depressed AND have trust issues, or they're not ready to go to anyone about their thoughts yet. Show them that they can trust you not to spread this within people who have the capability to do nothing but make it worse [children at school, cliques & little groups, bullies] and that you will be there for them at anytime of need. People's personal lives are called personal for a reason. When someone lets you into their personal life, you shouldn't share what's going on without permission.
When they open up to you, if it's something that's extremely unhealthy, don't be afraid to tell an adult or anyone that can help. Just give the basics if the person you're trying to help is extremely insistent on trust. Maybe the person doesn't want you to tell, but help is something that can seriously change someone who is depressed's life. If you feel like you're betraying someone by telling someone else [that can help,]- try and think of all the good it can do to the person you're trying to help. They can feel so much better by just talking to someone who can truly help and is professional with helping. Some people tend to be a ton better after seeing someone or opening up with anyone that can professionally help. Schools across the whole United States regularly have a psychologist and multiple counselors. You can start from there, or talk to your parent about helping your friend in need. Remember to think about everything you say to someone who is depressed. Especially for people who are regularly sarcastic, be careful.

There are many other mental illnesses and depression is only one of them. Depression affects approximately 20% of teenagers today. In the United States alone, 1 of 5 teenagers have a serious mental illness. If anyone needs help, don't be afraid to show that you have it.

 

This thread is very helpful, thank you for writing it!

 

Depressed people, do not like to share their thoughts until they feel open about it.

 

Yeah thats everyone. If you dont feel open about something is the same thing as not wanting to share something. This is just pointing out the obvious. Like Food does not fill you up, until you eat it. Anyways just because they dont like something doesn't mean it doesn't help. Do you think Alcoholic people want to go to AA meetings at first? Or drug addicts are excited to go to rehab? No, but those are the only ways they will get better. Same with depression and actually talking to people about your problems. Lying and covering it up leads to suicide and self harm.

 

:DAwesome Thread.

 

Dude... I have real bad depression. Plus, I can't be alone for long or else bad things happen. Say... In gym class the other day, my locker-partner didn't show up, and she's my best friend. So I sat on the bleachers and waited the whole 90 minutes for class to be over. I literally just stared blankly at the floor. I started taking anti-depressant pills when I was 13, and you know... Why would doctors even recommend those if they are known to cause suicidal thoughts. Yes, it's sad that our whole generation basically deals with depression of some sort, but it IS normal, and you aren't alone.

 

While I agree that it is normal to feel depression, we do share one thing in common at least. Long periods of not speaking to someone often put me in a state of panic or anger. I know it can be a little uncomfortable to speak to third party people about your problems, but I along with others are here for you in case you need any help. You can PM me any of your problems but only if you are comfortable with it.

One thing that I always remind myself is that no matter how dark a room gets, turning on your flashlight will always shine light. Don't be so quick to give up and turn your flashlight off. Keep your flashlight on, and look for that light switch. It's there, you just haven't found it yet.

Best wishes from Sirius!