- Aug 25, 2014
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- March 29
- March 29
hi!! my name's a rob; previously known as Kantola on the forums
i'm currently 16 years old i'm an aesthetic piece of trash
i love making new friends!
facts about me
i'm obsessed with aesthetic pictures
i love drawing
i have two cats, emils and laila
i spend a lot of time on netflix, sadly
i'm obsessed with stranger things
talking to friends make my day
my spirit animal is a panther
i love the color is black and teal
im so cute
brb getting food
forever my smollest bean
music bc i can't live without it
netflix with that special person
social media, just focusing on instagram
my journal where i write all of my poems
food anyone gives me
town of salem
fake friends 'cause bye
my face and personality
idk what else...
my social media
And sometimes you’re 16 years old and love someone so much that you won’t care how they treat you. You’ll be so goddamn in love that you’ll ignore the toxic signs this person carries and justify their actions to your friends on the nights they find you crying on the floor. “He just cares about me” you’ll say, but you’re trying to convincing yourself more than them. It won’t be until you’ve shaped yourself into his ideal and he leaves anyway that you’ll realize he sucked up everything you were, that’ll be the moment you realize you’ll never be good enough for a toxic person. They will love you selfishly and make you believe there isn’t a you without them. And when they do leave, you’ll be the one picking up the broken pieces.
Don’t date an overthinker.
She’ll spend days analyzing your facial expressions when you speak, and nights deciphering what the period placement in your text message meant. She’ll agonize for hours over why you didn’t say hello to her at breakfast, and start to create unrealistic scenarios in her head that you decided you no longer liked her. Don’t date her, because otherwise she’ll suffocate you with her care. She’ll always ask you if you’re okay, and constantly say that she loves you just to hear you say it back to her. And she’ll cry, oh lord will she cry. She’ll cry over the way you looked at that girl, or the way your eyes stopped lighting up at her name. She’ll cry when you start kissing her like it’s your job, and touching her like it’s a habit. She’ll even overthink the fact that maybe she’s just overthinking. That you do still love her, that all these worries might actually just be in her head. And so when you do leave, she’ll still wake up nights six months from now replaying the memories over in her head like a jukebox thinking “Where did I go wrong?” or “What did I do this time?”.
Do not date an overthinker unless you plan on marrying her.
Isn’t it crazy though? How one day you’ll be sitting on your bed with a blade between your fingers and your hair in your hands, screaming into your pillow case about how you fucked up so beyond your control this time and that you can’t go back and restart. But then one day, whether it be the next day or next week, you realize that you do get a restart. Every fucking morning when your eyelids flutter open and you smell the scent of coffee on your lips. You restart. It’s as if the universe trickled little whispers on truth into your mind that you really can make that choice to be happy for at least that day, to tell that lady with bags under her eyes that she’ll be okay, to tell that boy in your Chem class that he has a a smile that could light up city lights, to call up your Mother to say that you know she tries her best and you still love her. You just fucking decide to appreciate the little things, because that’s always what we crave most on those hopeless nights. And oh, the bad nights won’t ever be over, but in those moments remember the good in the world. Remember the scent of coffee and the city lights, remember that you’ll restart.
Sometimes when your chapter collides with someone else’s, it is only meant to be a couple of pages. They are there to be your climaxes, conflicts, and your plot twists. These people are meant to come and go.And sometimes when your chapter collides with someone else’s, it is meant to be an entire book. These people are there to be your plot developments and your character growth. You begin to see new perspectives on life and learn to love yourself through them. And if you hold them close enough, and they’ll become your epilogue.
I used to think I didn’t believe in love anymore. But that’s not true, I do believe in love. I just don’t believe in permanence. I know the feeling of my heart being torn in half for another person, I know the feeling that I’d give them the universe if I had to, I know that I believe in love.But I also know that everything in life is too unpredictable to believe in forever. That just because I am in love with him today, that it does not mean he will not hurt me tomorrow. It does not mean that life will not separate us into different states, or that tomorrow he’ll not prefer her curly brown hair over mine.
I’m not afraid of love, I’m afraid of life.
thank you for reading my info page and i hope you
have an amazing rest of your day!
extra aesthetic pictures